Men die by suicide 3.5 times more often than women do in the U.S. Why?
A leading factor is body issue, a topic commonly associated with females and not often solved among men. But it is a serious problem for both genders. A counselor at Milwaukee School of Engineering said that he saw through survey an increase over the past ten years of male college students who expressed they were dissatisfied with their bodies. This is correlated with a rising body image for men, who are struggling desperately to keep up with the ever rising crisis of their masculinity. Many, myself once included, sometimes mock men for acting as if their masculinity is so fragile that the slightest act will destroy it, only making the issue worse.
And with the rise of feminism, there was the beginning of the destruction of female body and gender expectations. For example, a woman can shop in the male’s section, and no one bats an eye; but if a man shops in the female section, suddenly he’s a freak. This is because there hasn’t been a major movement yet to succeed in removing the need for masculinity among men, instead rising with more critique of the male figure, wanting defined abs and muscles. This is completely opposite among female body image, which is lowering the need to be skinny or fit to be considered beautiful. When a non-traditionally beautiful girl is with an attractive man, he is suddenly a patron saint. But when an attractive girl is with a non-traditionally beautiful man (or just ugly or fat, as they are so affectionately labeled) she gets told she could “do so much better.”
But the question that I, as a teen male with body issues propose is where were all my supporters when someone called me fat? Call a girl fat and half the world is down your throat in a matter of minutes. Where were my supporters when I was called ugly? Worthless? Where were my supporters when I alienated myself almost completely from getting any friends in elementary and middle school by gravitating towards more traditionally effeminate things like music and poetry instead of sports? I remember that in third grade I cried because I found out the my parents weren’t just “taking a break” but actually getting full-blown divorced, and being shamed and abused for crying, because guys don’t cry. Never mind that you’re figuring out that your father is going to leave your life nearly completely. If any of these things were applied to a female, the person in question would be hated, labeled a sexist, and shamed. But when it is a man, no one bats an eye?
I have been told before that I was a “faggot” because I didn’t fit the gender roles I was expected to. I have been told I wasn’t “good” or “man” enough to deserve life because I preferred singing to sports. I have hated myself because I didn’t fit my role in life. I have myself, in the past, struggled with suicide and been lucky enough to realize it was not the right decision and to just accept myself. But I weep for those who did not get the attention they needed. I weep for those who watched others stand by as people belittled their worth based on weight. I weep for those who hated themselves so much that they ended their own life. I weep for them because the only reason nothing was done to solve it was because they were a boy. And they should’ve just “manned up.”
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