The odd thing about opinions is that we all have them. And by all means, we should. Everyone is entitled to having an opinion, but not everyone is entitled to shoving their opinion down someone else’s throat. When I say opinion, I do not include things like racism, sexism and homophobia (transphobia) because that’s not an opinion, that’s just a blatant disregard of human life all due to sheer ignorance.
Opinions are our way of looking at life. Opinions are our beliefs. We voice our opinions and we give them expression, we put them out in the world to be shared, critiqued or questioned. It’s probably the only thing; we as a human society have in common despite the vast variations in our opinions. Ever since the onset of the “world wide web” or the internet, we all have a platform to express our opinions. And it’s great. You have a place where you can go and talk about what you feel, share a feeling, etc. The problem occurs when you tweet something which, let me remind, applies to you because well, it’s your opinion and someone seems to not be fond of it, so they choose to ridicule you for it. It’s latent bullying. And there’s a difference between, “I don’t agree with this.” And “You’re a slut.” You’re not just slut shaming which is such an absurd and sexist opinion to hold anymore, but you’re also basically saying that if you met someone in real life, and you didn’t agree with what they said, you’ll start calling them names. God forbid if you actually do that, do not bother reading the rest of this article because it’ll probably make you call me names too.
You’re allowed hold onto whatever you believe in but, if you do not agree with what someone says, unless they personally mention or attack you in any way because of your opinion, you have NO RIGHT to insult them, abuse them or threaten them. They haven’t done anything to you. I’ve been called a “stupid slut” because I raised my voice on Twitter against sexist jokes. Apparently I deserved no happiness in life because I held an opinion contrary to what was popularly believed. Look, I never mentioned anyone in particular, I simply said what I felt and I was attacked like I had committed a sin. It wasn’t one person alone, it started with that and then it went to hoards of sexists just entering my mentions and bashing me and shading me, even indirecting me. It was amazing. I got my 5 minutes of fame and then I realized what bullshit it was.
You go on a big YouTuber’s video. And open the comments. There’ll be nice stuff about their videos, about them from their supporters but every 10 comments I mind you, there’s going to be a, “YOU SUCK” or a “LAME”. There’s someone sitting behind their computer screen, opening a 5 minute video with an appropriate title, spending 5 minutes there voluntarily and then they’re being an asshole about it. You opened it, you watched it, and you, my friend, wasted a minute of your life commenting on it. Pretty sure it didn’t make you feel better. And unless that YouTuber made a direct jab at you, your community, shamed someone you know, made a sexist, racist or homophobic remark, you have no right to insult them. If you have an opinion, there is a way to express it, in a rather civilized manner.
Let me remind you of something, when you’re about to comment something rude or ungenerous to someone who didn’t directly mention you, you’re the contemptible person there. Even if you’re trying to educate someone on something you believe in and you think they are problematic about it, you don’t go about yelling in their faces and tell them to agree with you or you’ll kill them. I get that you’re offended but you have no right to play with someone like that and threaten them like that.
When Priyanka Chopra was recently on the cover of TIME Magazine and was included in the 100 Most Influential People of 2016, there were plenty Facebook posts made about that. I happily liked them, felt super proud of her but then, I opened the comments. There was not one positive comment about this. There were debates about whether she’s influential enough, whether she’s ‘good enough’ to be there, or how she ‘sucks’ and she’s ‘not even pretty’. I’d get if I saw Donald Trump there and people seriously questioned it but apparently not, apparently someone who is not extremely problematic, is very talented and is a hard worker is just not enough for these trolls.
You’re allowed to be offended; hell it’s probably your birthright by the looks of it. You’re allowed to feel the way you want. You’re allowed to have your own opinion. But you are not allowed to be a jerk to someone else about it. You don’t always have to express what you have in mind, especially not if it runs the risk of potentially causing harm. And if they haven’t caused you any harm and not made any direct jabs at you, just keep your mouth shut.
Offense is subjective. So is your opinion. And so is theirs.
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