To all the closeted teens this holiday season,
This Thanksgiving is my first Thanksgiving in which I am out to some of my friends and some people at school as queer. The time that I have been out to these people has been some of the best times of my life. I feel more liberated in my sexuality than ever, I am freer to speak about my relationship interests in an honest way and I have grown closer to my friends than ever before. The people in my life who are aware of my sexuality have been more supportive than I could ever imagine.
With all of the support that I am receiving, I still cannot muster up the will to come out to my family and everyone else I know. Living in a religious family strikes an incomparable fear in me that my family won’t accept me for who I am. For these reasons, I will spend this Thanksgiving as a closeted queer teen.
Knowing that I will see family I rarely see, combined with family I see nearly every day is a hard thing to fathom. Hyper-masculinity will run rampant as the men yell at the women to, “hurry up with dinner already!” and talk about the latest sports news with fervor. The women will gossip about how grown up I have become and how I should start dating soon. It’s nearly certain that the recent election will arise, followed by a harmonious echo of how the possibility of anti-LGBTQ+ legislation is something that “this country needs.”
I am certain that these fears turned realities strike a chord with many closeted queer teens. And if you are one of those teens, you can know one thing for certain: I am with you tomorrow, through the holiday season, and every day.
Holidays can be a hard time for closeted queer teens everywhere, second to none. While family togetherness can be an invaluable time to bond, it can also be a time for extreme contention. And you may not have a family to spend time with tomorrow, in which I hope that you find a place that makes you feel comfortable. No matter the situation, I know that you may be feeling scared; scared of what may happen not just tomorrow, but every day throughout this holiday season.
Let me assure you of one thing: you are valid.
Your sexuality is valid. Your gender is valid. All aspects of you are valid, and nothing can take that away from you. Not even a colonialist holiday based on the massacre of millions of native peoples.
Tomorrow may be a difficult day. Lean on the support systems that you do have. Whether that be friends, the internet, or a journal. Take a moment to breathe and remember that there are millions of people out there that support and love you for who you are. And most importantly, remember that I love you for who you are, even if I don’t know you because I know one thing: your queerness is valid.
