Abuse is a heavy word. Most of us don’t want to look at ourselves as a victim. You tell yourself “Me? No, not me.” There comes a time when you notice that you’re always feeling a certain way – sad, hopeless, or alone. You go from being in denial to asking yourself “But why me though?” You realize that you shouldn’t even be thinking about how many times you’ve cried this month.
It’s even harder to face it when your abuser is someone who is supposed to love you unconditionally – not a friend from school or a neighbor, but a parent, sibling, family member, or a long time significant other. I don’t approve of self diagnosing, but I’ve always had this idea sitting in the back of my mind. When I came across this thread on twitter, I couldn’t deny it any longer. I was being emotionally abused.
emotional abuse is very real pic.twitter.com/o39LO6LBx6
— cynthia ⓥ (@iwantchopants) October 30, 2016
‘”If one of your greatest fantasies involves not a dream career or winning the lottery but instead an escape plan succeeding, something’s wrong.”
Most people who go through emotional abuse are told that they’re just too sensitive. As a result, victims just keep their mouths closed and keep it all to themselves. I’d be lying if I said that I still don’t do that. However, you and I both know that it’s healthier to get it off of your chest. If you don’t want to spill your heart out to someone that you know, there is a website that I’ve used every once in a while since I was about thirteen years old called BlahTherapy.
You know when you’re venting and you feel like the person that you’re venting to is bored, doesn’t care, or is annoyed? On this website, people come to listen to you and they want to hear what you have to say so there is no need to worry. Be aware that the person you’re talking to isn’t a professional unless you pay for a therapist on the website. Free features include being the listener and being the venter.
Another solution is calling a teen hotline. Here you can talk to other teens who can relate to your situation or who just want to lend a shoulder. You can call, email (teens and adult professionals respond to emails), or use their message board where teens discuss mental health topics.
If you want to talk to a trained adult, call The Runaway Safeline. Even if you’re not contemplating on running away, they will listen. They will talk to you for as long as you wish and will give you some advice and solutions. For teens who do not live in the United States, click here for international hotlines.
They say that the first step to recovery is acknowledging that there is a problem. While I don’t have all of your answers, I know that most teens can’t easily escape these situations especially if their abuser is a parent. Know that it is not your fault; you are not the problem: they are. There is most likely nothing that you can do to change your abuser and it’s not your job to do so. Do what you can do to ease your situation or escape it.
Most importantly, you’ll get through this. Even if it feels like you won’t- you will. You’re a fighter.
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