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How An All-Girls School Taught Me to Be a Feminist

Empowering. Uncommon. Lively. Bold. Solidarity.

These are the words my former classmates chose to sum up the four years we spent sheltered within the walls of an all-girls Catholic high school. Yes, we wore plaid skirts, and yes, there were a couple of nuns meandering around campus. More than that though, there was an overwhelming sense of togetherness that blanketed each of us like the early morning mist.

My friends and I missed out on many classic high school rites of passage that were undoubtedly the cornerstones of the “teenage experience” for our public school counterparts. Many of us didn’t have boyfriends — we didn’t even interact with teenage boys on a daily basis.

But upon reflection, looking through my own well-worn pair of rose-tinted glasses, the good times far outweigh the bad ones. For the vast majority of us, no boys meant no worries, and we were free to be wholly ourselves without inhibitions. I believe we laughed louder, made dirtier jokes, raised our hands higher and formed more numerous, unlikely friendships than our coed counterparts.

We learned competitiveness. We learned how to be stubborn. We learned how to be independent, outspoken, opinionated, compassionate and above all else, we learned how to be feminists.

In Beyonce’s “Flawless,” Nigerian feminist author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie recites bitter words often maliciously muttered into girls’ ears: “You can have ambition but not too much. You should aim to be successful but not too successful, otherwise you will threaten the man.” These words were scrubbed from our minds every single day. There was no “man” to compete for or against. It was just us. Every day our teachers challenged us — required us — to aspire for knowledge, for higher education, for scholarships and universities.

We were the lucky ones; other girls around the United States, and especially in foreign countries, are not met with this encouragement and genuine respect. According to research conducted by the NAIS Commission on Accreditation, “87 percent of girls attending [American] all-girls schools feel their opinions are respected at their school compared to 58.1 percent of girls at coed public schools.” Additionally, “80.0 percent of girls’ school students report most of their classes challenge them to achieve their full academic potential. This is compared to 44.3 percent of girls at coed public schools.”

Thankfully, my formative years were spent surrounded by feminists; I developed sincere admiration for my classmates and trained myself to abide by the simple motto, “Girls protect girls.”

When 15 year-old Malala Yousafzai was shot on Oct. 9, 2012, I was a freshman in high school. We were about the same age. The moment a member of the Taliban pulled the trigger point blank at Malala’s head, I was safe in bed. By the time I arrived at school that Tuesday morning, Malala was already in intensive care, well on her way to recovery and her future as an advocate for girls’ education.

Malala attended an all-girls school in Pakistan and was almost killed because of it. One’s experience in education means something drastically different to each individual depending on her environment. For me (and probably for you) education means earning A’s and acceptance letters for scholarships and institutions for higher education. For girls like Malala who live in countries where many young women aren’t expected to aspire to anything more than marriage and domesticity, getting an education is an act of defiance. Each essay turned in is a rebellion. Each calculus problem solved is a revolution.

The pen is mightier than the sword, and I’m grateful I had an all-girls education to teach me that lesson. It is up to all of us to check our own privilege and do what is in our power to extend opportunities to those who aren’t even aware of their own capabilities. My high school experience allowed me to grow into the person I am meant to be without altering parts of myself to appease boys’ expectations. It is one thing to be a shameless feminist, and another thing to use that confidence to improve the lives of others.

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