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Why I Am Not Ready To Graduate High School

Over the span of twelve years, I’ve attended school hoping and praying for the day that I could finally leave what is referenced to as a hell-hole. In comparison though, the eight years leading up to entering high-school were nothing compared to the tedious, nerve-wracking, and monotonous experience the past four years were. You know those chick-flicks where the new girl enters high-school, and despite the fact that she has fights with her friends, and struggles with family dynamics, somehow manages to balance her social life, extra-curriculars, and ace her courses?

That was most definitely not me. I mean, come on. Really? You expect me to believe that I was meant to get through 8 courses every year, earn volunteer hours, join an extra-curricular, have a social life, and not have some sort of anxiety. Who were those movies meant to fool? I kid you not, I spent almost all of my childhood imagining high-school to be exactly as I had seen in High School Musical. I mean, Gabriella was the epitome of the perfect student, and I prayed I would turn out like her.

I was wrong.

You expect me to believe that I was meant to get through 8 courses every year, earn volunteer hours, join an extra-curricular, have a social life, and not have some sort of anxiety?

My high-school experience consisted of me waking up at ungodly hours, brushing my teeth half asleep, slapping make-up on my face, and skipping out on breakfast. Yay me, right?

But okay, all jokes aside, I think it’s just begun to hit me that senior year is almost over. In just about four and a half months, I won’t be seeing the same people every single day, I’ll be paying thousands of dollars to attend classes, and most importantly, I won’t have the sense of security I have grown used to. I mean we all hate and diss high-school, but let’s face it, we felt secure there.

There are so many factors that go into my fear, including choosing what I want to study, with the thought of changing my mind two years in, at the back of my mind. Throughout high-school, I’ve despised the idea of failure, even in the smallest of things. But, to enter an unknown place – be it college or university – I’m bound to fail at something. However, I won’t have the option of the safety cushion that I had in high-school. Amongst the hardest things though? Saying goodbye. We have to say  goodbye to the friends we see on a daily basis, because chances are, we’re not all going to attend the same colleges or universities. Being a teenager in high-school suddenly seems like the dream. Once you graduate, that’s it. I mean, don’t they say “High-school prepares you for the real world.”?

Then, why don’t I feel prepared at all?

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Meshall

Meshall described in eight words: Aspiring Activist. Avid Reader. Food Enthusiast. Television Fanatic. When she's not in a heated discussion about equality, she can be found watching Netflix and eating Ramen.

Meshall

Meshall described in eight words: Aspiring Activist. Avid Reader. Food Enthusiast. Television Fanatic. When she's not in a heated discussion about equality, she can be found watching Netflix and eating Ramen.

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