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Being In A Relationship Isn’t Everything

If you’re reading this, you’re probably old enough to know about relationships, sexuality and all that jazz teens find out about once they hit the ripe old age of 13. Some have had boyfriends/girlfriends and other experiences, while some are still in the process of acquiring one and some just don’t care or have the time for those things. I’m here to say that having a boyfriend/girlfriend doesn’t mean as much as everyone makes it out to be.

Sure, having someone that gave you gifts, someone you could talk to all the time or someone that gave you compliments would be nice, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you like your significant other. Could it be that you just like the idea of having a significant other and the actions and feelings that come along with it?

If you think getting into a relationship will make you ‘whole’ or ‘complete,’ think again.

Having a relationship is nice, but the process of getting into one may be a little bumpy. For example, getting to know a group of guys/girls with your own group of friends can be very difficult. Personally, I have found that jealousy is the biggest cause of splitting friend groups; whether it be jealousy for someone’s relationship or jealousy for someone’s looks, it will always be complicated. Having a stable group of comrades will provide you with an equilibrium. New relationships tend to take up a large chunk of time in the beginning, and a good group of friends will remind you to stay balanced. Maybe try not letting the idea of flirting or relationships get in the way of you and your pals. After all, you knew them before you knew your new guy or girl.

Another bump in the road could also be the person you’re getting into a relationship with. Don’t be fooled by good looks or witty comments or compliments, get to know their personality and find out if they could be a good influence or someone that could motivate you to do some wrongs. Even the strongest people can find themselves in a toxic relationship but the longer they stay, the more they are likely to evolve into someone who is a smaller, less confident, more wounded version of the person they used to be.

Lastly, relationships get in the way of your “me time“, which is more important than anything. Being in a relationship will take your focus off from yourself and one can find themselves beginning to do things for their significant other more so than for themselves. It’s better to be secure within yourself than to depend on others for validation. “Love is unconditional. Relationships aren’t.” Everyone will come and go, but you’re yourself forever; appreciate you before others do.

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Gabrielle Mendoza
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gabby is a 16 year old writer and occasional musician. gabby is probably interested in the same TV show, music, movie, video game or artist as you are. knock knock. who's there? helloimgabbyy@gmail.com

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