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“Some Refugees Are Definitely Terrorists” Says a Genocidal Dictator

Bashar al Assad, the man more commonly known as president of Syria who is responsible for the 450,000 deaths of his own country’s citizens, sat down with Yahoo! News to discuss the 4.8 million people who have fled his country due to civil war. In a statement that seems to imply that Trump’s travel ban is not bad and actually good, Assad said “some refugees are definitely terrorists.” To back up his powerful accusation with some cold, hard evidence, that some of the refugees, who have lost their homes and lives due to his ruthlessness “are definitely terrorists” Assad stated “You can find it on the Net.” Again, cold, hard evidence. The man, whose actions are credited by experts to be one of the most significant sources of empowerment to the rise and growing popularity of the Islamic State and other terrorist organizations, added to his statement saying “you don’t need a significant number to commit atrocities”. If only there was a single demagogue, solely responsible for the world’s most major humanitarian crisis to serve as an example for this point.

President Assad, who is literally responsible for starting massive genocide, a conflict so gruesome and deadly that the 21st century has yet to see anything else like it, wants you to know that he’s not a bad guy.

After Amnesty International released a report saying that at least 13,000 people have been killed in massive hangings and other torture tactics in military prisons, Assad has come out to deny the report and even called it “fake news.” Does that sound familiar to anyone? I can’t quite put my hands on it. It’s just hard to catch a break when you’re a just a simple man who began the slaughtering of his own citizens in 2011 after they held peaceful protests, in which they begged not to be treated violently, and has since ignited a crisis that many have likened to the Holocaust. It’s almost like people just can’t respect the fact that you would seriously prefer to operate your human slaughterhouse in some good old fashioned peace and quiet!
He also talks about wanting to ensure that the Syrian citizens which have escaped to all ends of the world to no longer be subjected to his tyranee, can come back home. It seems as if his feelings are hurt that these people would run away from his after he’s been so nice to help them get started in home renovations by tearing their houses to the ground and has even ended the dread and anxiety of family events by literally killing their families!

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