Junior year was an especially hard time for me. My mental health was at an all-time low, my family kept picking at me about my weight, and I was losing interest in the things that meant the most to me. Worst of all, I was sleeping even less than usual.
On average, I was getting about 2-3 hours of sleep a night. The average person my age (16-18) needs an average of 8-10 hours of sleep a night. If you include homework, socializing, and extracurricular activities then on average we get about 5-6 hours of sleep. Not only was I not getting enough sleep, but I was getting even less sleep than what was below average. It took a toll on my personal life in more ways than one. During the day I was functioning on coffee, candy, and energy drinks so that I wouldn’t walk around like a zombie. At night I was either doing schoolwork, reading, or watching Netflix.
No matter what I did, I couldn’t bring myself to fall asleep at a decent hour. When I did finally fall asleep it’s because my body shut down on its own. All of the hours that I was spending awake hurt my writing and all my other daily activities such as sports. It was such an unhealthy state for me to be in but the worst part was that I didn’t feel there was a way out of it. So, I took drastic measures.
One night I had a really terrible headache and I went to my Grandmother for some pain medication. She’s a diabetic so she can’t take things like Ibuprofen and she can only use certain types of Tylenol. It just so happens that she only had her Tylenol PM which, doubles as a sleeping pill. She recommended I take one since I had school the next day because two would keep me asleep for a while. It sounded tempting, I’ll admit that, but I took one that first night. Within thirty minutes of taking the pill I was asleep. It was the fastest I’d fallen asleep in months and I slept for about seven hours. The next day I was energized without the caffeine and sugar and I was able to eat and function normally. However, I knew that eventually I’d be back at home in my bed struggling to fall asleep again. And sure enough, I was. I remember thinking that if I just took one more pill it’d be okay and I’d sleep and eventually my body would be used to sleeping. That night I took two pills and slept for ten hours. Best sleep I’d had in months. That’s when the pattern started.
Every night I would come home and take 1-2 pills at the same time so that I would get a guaranteed eight hours of sleep. It seemed harmless at the time and maybe it was but as I keep taking them my dependence on the pills became a problem. It could have turned into something worse, like an overdose on acetaminophen, which is usually fatal. However, I soon realized that sleeping pills could be prescribed and not just bought at Walgreens so I sought out a prescription for Ambien. That was a first step for me– figure out how I can solve this sleeping problem with a long-term solution. Sadly, I didn’t understand that this was slowly turning into an addiction or, it would have had my mother and grandmother not caught on.
I couldn’t get my hands on a prescription but in this day and age it’s very easy to find someone who can. If you’ve heard the stories of teens taking other teens’ medication, here’s my take: DO NOT DO IT. Prescriptions are given based on need and just like with Xanax and Klonopin, if you need a stronger dose then doctors prescribe that specifically for you not for anyone else. Taking someone else’s medicine is highly dangerous and it was a good thing that my family caught on to what was happening before I reached that point. A study done by the University of Florida found that out of the 750 students they tested, 54% of them reported non-medical drug use; including using someone else’s medication or taking more than recommended by their doctor. According to the University of Michigan, teens prescribed anxiety medication or sleeping pills are up to 12 times as likely to abuse those drugs. I didn’t need those drugs, I needed to talk to someone about why I couldn’t sleep but like most teens who feel desperate or helpless I chose to find a quicker way out of my problem. It’s not worth the risk. More than 2000 teens begin abusing prescription pills each day and I don’t want myself or anyone else to be one of them.
When my family caught on to what was happening, I started to freak out. I wasn’t worried about their reaction because I knew what that would be, I was worried about what would have happened if I hadn’t been caught. I could have lost a lot more than sleep, I could have lost my life and looking back I realize that it would have been easier to talk to my loved ones rather than trying to handle it on my own.
