Written by Grace Osiemi
If you’re black, you’ve probably heard:
“I like you… ’cause you’re not ghetto.”
“You’re the smartest… black person I know!”
“You should straighten your hair… otherwise it looks “nappy.””
” Are you sure you aren’t mixed? You don’t even act black.”
“You’re like an Oreo! Black on the outside, but white on the inside!”
And the all too familiar:
“You’re pretty… for a black girl :)”
These cute little backhanded compliments seem overall harmless, but believe me, I’m not smiling. Microaggressions are the hidden, or not so hidden, ways that society uses to express that being white/cis/hetero/neurotypical/male is the norm, the preferred standard. It doesn’t seem negative on the surface but in reality, microaggressions perpetuate the most damaging messages. They are the verbal, nonverbal, and inconspicuous insults, often unintentional, that perpetuate negative/ derogatory messages towards marginalized groups. It’s harder to notice microaggressions in society because they may not always appear negative or demeaning since they’re incorporated into everyday situations. However unintentional these statements may be, they cause serious harm to the groups they are targeted at.
Statements or actions that perpetuate stereotypes based on race are forms of racial microaggressions. Growing up I always heard people exclaim that I’m smarter than they anticipated or claim that I’m half black simply because I didn’t follow all of the negative stereotypes of black people. No one came up to me and said, “I think all black people are uneducated, poor, drug addicts, but you’re the exception,” however that’s exactly what they meant when they said, “Wow you aren’t like other black people! You’ll make it far!” Statements that praise someone for being closer to the stereotypes of the privileged group rather than those of a marginalized group are extremely toxic. These stereotypes and ideas are the reasons why it’s difficult for marginalized groups to gain access to the same opportunities, universities, jobs, etc. as the privileged.
Oftentimes, groups encounter microaggressions in several forms as their marginalization intersects. Women of color constantly experience microaggressions in the form of fetishization and oversexualization in the media. African-American women typically face microaggressions based on the ideas that they are aggressive, short-tempered, and dangerous, evident in the “angry black woman” trope that many black female celebrities have been labelled as. In this case, being a woman adds to the ways in which microaggressions will be expressed. Of course, microaggressions don’t just stop at race and gender, but tend to include sexuality as well. Black trans women often face microaggressions in the form of misogynoir, transphobia, and cissexism; they commonly receive criticism concerning their legitimacy of womanhood based on whether or not they pass as a cis woman. People belonging to multiple marginalized groups contributes to the nature of the microaggressions they will face.
Many have described microaggressions as “self-victimization” claiming that those who discuss the concept are merely derailing from the real issues of racism in society and that it’s just an “overreaction.” Being told you aren’t expected to excel because of your skin color IS an issue. Having to constantly explain why your gender shouldn’t determine your ability to achieve tasks IS an issue. Answering questions that insinuate that your sexuality isn’t valid IS an issue. Marking off microaggressions as harmless acts does nothing but ignore the effects of these incidents, and further harm marginalized groups. These aren’t imaginary, they are real problems in society that must be addressed, discussed, and changed. No one is an Oreo.
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