“Women putting down other women is like telling the world that you are more worried about your “competition” than your own progress”
Women, feminists or not, shouldn’t be afraid of calling other women out on being perpetrators of their own misogyny. It’s not dismissing the accountability of sexism, but rather holding ourselves accountable for our own behavior. Women, if treated equally, should be subjected to similar standards of respect, dignity, and integrity. We’ve all been there–jealous, insecure, catty, competitive at some point or another. The point is that we not only criticize patriarchy, sexism, and the conditioning by media forced onto women but also subject ourselves to the same level of scrutiny to pave the path to substantial change.
The fight is not to show each other down, it’s to be seen as equal to men.
“I’m one of the guys!”
I’m insecure in the way my gender affects how I’m treated, so I effectively disassociate myself from it. Equality can’t exist if I’m a woman, so I have to act “manly” in order to be treated as such.
“I’m not like other girls”
I’ve bought into the misogynistic stereotypes of women. Implying that I’m not bitchy, I don’t complain, speak my mind, have standards, or “High Maintenance”. Further solidifying the stereotypes propagated by society. I have to actively show my worth by trying to “differentiate” myself from other women.
“Guys/Men prefer __________”
*Insert physical appearance, attitude, or behavior* The implication that men dominate feminine standards and should be held over other women if they don’t comply with these standards.The idea that siding with such standards gives you the advantage in this “competition”giving you leverage on the “playing field”.
“Why are you single?”
My worth is measured by my relationship and partner. I pity those so unfortunate to be single. I can’t respect a women’s decision to be single by asking her to justify a legitimate and valid choice.
“Don’t worry, you’re prettier/hotter/more attractive than her”
I’m trying to comfort and console you, but I’m confirming that there is, in fact, a war amongst women, and our “success” depends upon how attractive we are. I’m comforting you by saying you should feel superior to other women based on physical attractiveness and the only way to get a man’s attention is solely based on appearance
Rather than become angered and feel threatened by other women, internalize and humanize these feelings in order to actively understand and support women, eliminating the vicious cycle.
“Strong women lift each other up”
For a more introspective outlook on the competition between women and the inspiration of this article-Please Read Laura Maxwell’s: Stop The Competition Between Women.
