Many Religious circles are known for not being very LGBT+ friendly. Several different denominations preach against same-sex relationships more often than not with Bible passages and the infamous “Adam and Eve” ideology. Of course, some are more known for being anti-gay than others. The notorious Westboro Baptist Church is known for their ugly “God Hates F*gs” signs, their homophobic rhetoric, and their ever-pressing need to picket funerals. And then there’s the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (LDS) which received backlash just last year for openly discriminating against LGBT+ students in its code of conduct.
While I don’t think Westboro is going to be changing their outlook on things anytime soon, the Mormon church launched a website recently to share stories of gay missionaries and their struggles of growing up LGBT. This website is only going to change the face of LDS churches across the United States and further the evolution of religion in the present day. In a context where sex and questions about sex are often disregarded or altogether ignored, this website tackles the information head on, even providing their viewers with a frequently asked questions page with advice on what to do if you’re a Mormon who suspects they may be gay.
From Mormon And Gay: If you decide to share your experiences of feeling same-sex attraction or to openly identify as gay, you should be supported and treated with kindness and respect, both at home and in church. We all need to be patient with each other as we figure things out.
Each of the stories focuses on a single individual who has served a mission with the Church and also identifies as gay or lesbian. Some openly embrace their attractions while others are unsure if they want to pursue it and actually settle down into a same-sex relationship. They talk of being bullied or being bullies themselves, being terrified of their secret coming out, about navigating friendships while experiencing romantic attractions, and about trying to find God while accepting the truth about themselves. Although I am not a member of the LDS church and accepted my queerness long ago, some of the stories resonated deeply with me. I know what it’s like to grow up gay and experience these scary but exciting feelings and the stories capture them quite well.
Some of the stories obviously touch on a darker side, as suicide rates for LGBT+ members are unusually high when compared to the general population. They shared that their attractions brought them grief, deep depression, and suicidal tendencies. But the website has a Beliefs page with a lovely article on how no matter how much you may want to, you cannot pray away the gay. The church admits that you cannot force someone to change their sexuality and shares that they can help change someone’s heart and rid them of the self-hatred their sexuality may burden them with.
From Jesus Christ Can Change Our Hearts: Sadly we acknowledge that such a blessing does not, or at least has not yet, come to all parents who anguish over a wide variety of their children’s circumstances, but here there was hope. And, I must say, this son’s sexual orientation did not somehow miraculously change—no one assumed it would. But little by little, his heart changed.”
The one downside that I will admit this website has is that a lot of the stories talk about queerness as though it’s a disease that they are being forced to live with instead of it being a genuinely positive aspect of themselves. They label it as “SSA” (same-sex attraction) and talk about it the same way someone would if they were telling you about medical disorder they have. My hope for the people who wrote about their sexuality like it’s an infection rather than something that deserves to be normalized, is that they begin to find healing and strength within themselves. I hope they find a common ground with both their religion and their sexuality because everyone deserves to feel comfortable with who they love. Everyone definitely deserves a chance to experience true love and an intimate relationship.
Another grievance I have with the site is that it leaves out those who are transgender and those who struggle with gender dysphoria. Even though they share on the site that sexuality and gender identity are two separate issues, I’d like to see them expand on trans issues as well and open up a platform for transgender members of the church.
While the LDS church (and other religious organizations in general) still have a long way to go in regards to LGBT+ community, (an apology maybe?!?) I’m glad that the Mormon church launched this website. It’s nice to see them make an effort and offer a supportive and uplifting community for their minority members. I want to see other denominations follow suit. Church is supposed to be an open and accepting place, and it’s amazing to see a religious organization act on that truth instead of spreading hate. I sincerely hope they continue down this path and open up more LGBT safe spaces for members of their congregation. After all, #LoveIsLove.
