I follow an Instagram account called “meandmyed.art” and it’s a page full of artworks about the artist, Christie, and other people’s struggles with eating disorders and the recovery from them, through art. It’s a beautiful page, full of messages about body-positivity and acceptance, all from the perspective of someone who has suffered and struggled with loving themselves.
But it was a post that Christie posted last night that got me really thinking, about why attention seeking, shouldn’t be seen as a bad thing. It’s an artwork of a peacock with the words, “Sure, when a peacock is attention seeking, they’re beautiful but when I do it, I’m a disgrace.” And the caption says “Wanting attention doesn’t make us a bad person. It just means we are lacking the level of love we deserve. Sometimes our insecurities mean we need extra attention and reassurance and that can be hard for the people in our lives. Sometimes those people leave, and sometimes they stay. No matter what those people do, you are still worthy of love and attention, and it is not disgraceful to ask for it.”
I’ve always struggled with the concept of attention seeking and being perceived as doing things for attention or to be validated for whatever reason. It’s one of the reasons I struggle to speak about my issues with anxiety because for everyone I saw who spoke about their struggles, I also saw the onslaught of people telling them they were “faking” or “making it up” or “exaggerating for attention”. And I always hated that, because here these people are, reaching out, and obviously struggling, and you want to make them feel guilty for wanting and needing some attention?
If you are seeking attention, for whatever reason, know that you’re valid and worthy of all the love and attention you desire.
In a world currently focussing on the millennial generation, people like to make snarky remarks and comments about people who post selfies, about people who wear what they want, about people who wear lots of makeup, about people who are loud and opinionated. They’re labelled “attention seekers”, “sluts”, “whores”, “sick”, “not well”; all sorts of phrases that people use to inflict pain. But being an “attention seeker”, or posting selfies because you like the way you look or wearing what you want because you like it, you are valid and deserving of everything you seek.
You have everything you need in you, but wanting attention is not a bad thing, it is not dirty or gross; it is natural, and you deserve it.
