Today is Mother’s Day, which means that many people around the world are celebrating the person that has supported and cared for them their whole lives. We often forget the sacrifices that our mothers have made for us, which is why Mother’s Day is so important.
What many people seem to forget around this time, however, is that not everyone has a great mother or a mother at all. Around Mother’s Day, we are all bombarded with posts with the general message of “You have to do something amazing for your mom because she deserves the world”. While this mindset may be true for some people, it completely ignores the people who have a toxic or absent mother.
As a society, we constantly associate bad or toxic parenting with fathers, but very few people realize that there are toxic mothers, and they can be as equally damaging to children.
Mother’s Day can be an extremely emotional and confusing day for people who have had a rough relationship with their mothers. They can feel guilty for not wanting to do anything special, or sad that they don’t have a great mother to spend the day with. They can feel a huge mixture of emotions.
What is important to remember is that how you spend the day is up to you. No one should make you feel bad for what you decide to do on Mother’s Day. Everyone’s feelings and experiences are different, and it’s up to you to decide what is the best way to spend the day without it being harmful to your mental health.
You can choose to spend the entire day with your mom, or you can just give her a small gift, or you can completely ignore the day itself. You have the freedom to choose whatever you want to do on Mother’s Day and no one has the right to shame you about how you decide to celebrate.
Mother’s Day is always hard for those who have dealt with toxic, abusive, or absent mothers. It’s even harder when everyone around them and everyone on social media is talking about the amazing plans they have with their moms. It’s incredibly important that we are all conscious about how we talk about days like this. And, if you are one of those people that have had a not-so-ideal relationship with their mom, you can get through today, even if it means not celebrating to do so.