Compliments. A good amount of us, if not all of us, love them. When the people close to us tell us how smart, good-looking, talented, or nice we are, it makes us feel good about ourselves. Sometimes it even influences how we view ourselves. And sometimes, it’s not just the people that are close to us. Sometimes total strangers have a kind word for us too, and that can uplift us, as well.
But when is a comment not a compliment? Catcalling is an issue that is faced by many people and includes remarks on a person’s appearance, whistling, and other inappropriate gestures such as honking.
Recently, Reebok released an image on Twitter exploring when it was appropriate to say the comment “You’re in good shape…beautiful.” All the scenarios listed in the picture were major no-nos, save for the scenario that you find an action figure that’s still in, well, good shape. Among the no-nos, were being alone with a woman in an elevator, working out alongside a woman in a gym, or being near a woman at the coffee line.
In case you were wondering when it IS appropriate to say, "You're in such good shape…beautiful,"… THIS: pic.twitter.com/Z1cnnRD8Ut
— Reebok (@Reebok) July 14, 2017
In this case, it seems that Reebok’s post is referring to catcalling and sexual harassment. all sorts of people had something to say about this post. And not all of them were happy. A lot of people complained that the post took it too far, and that it really was a genuine compliment. Most of these complainers were men, but some were women as well.
So I decided to ask three young women who have been catcalled about their experiences as well what they thought was the difference between catcalling and complimenting.
“A compliment is usually given face to face with a lot of sincerity…For me personally, catcalling is another irritating form of sexual harassment,” said Ilana Narvaza, who’s been honked and whistled at. On Reebok’s picture and the reactions it got, Narvaza said “There are appropriate times to say things. But it’s different for everyone.”
Raeeka Yusuf talked about feeling self-conscious after receiving comments about the way she looks or what she’s wearing. “I wouldn’t really say it bothers me a lot but it kinda throws me off and makes me question how I dress or look.” She described catcalls as behaviors that make one feel embarrassed and are aggressive.”I think I’m pretty happy with this post…the wording of that compliment can mean a lot of things, like you’re admiring parts of someone…it can come off as inappropriate even if that wasn’t the intention.”
Gabriella De Gracia recounted her experience of being honked at numerous times on one walk home and being yelled at and followed by an old man in his car. On the Reebok post, she said that ,”It is offensive. A stranger has no place commenting on your body because you’re not meat.”
Reebok’s post recognizes that catcalling is a serious topic that shouldn’t be swept aside. Statistics show that most women, on an international level, have experienced harassment between the ages of 11 and 17. All three girls that I have interviewed are still teenagers. They haven’t even reached the age of 20 and already have to put up with this kind of behavior, behavior that is uncalled for and rude. We should acknowledge that catcalling objectifies and demeans and we should acknowledge that that is the opposite of what compliments are supposed to do.
