It has been made socially acceptable for boys to be unconnected from their emotions. From very young ages the idea that it is not manly to cry or be kind is molded into boys heads.
Men are told that it is wrong to cry, wear or appreciate “feminine” colors, be skinny, be short, not have muscles, not have facial hair, write poetry, sing, dance, watch romances and so many more things simply because they are “gay” or too feminine. As if it was wrong to be gay or feminine, they use these words with negative connotations as if there aren’t people who live with these labels every day.
Men are not allowed to show too many emotions because they need to be strong or they need to be reserved.
I recently watched an episode of a show where a father cheated on a mother so the two youngest children are in a room crying together, their older sibling comes in to comfort them but instead of equally comforting them she tells the boy that he must be strong for his sister and she hugs up on the girl.
That left with really no option but to just sweep his feelings under the rug to address later (but really just continue to ignore).
I see situations like this all the time with family or other families and a young boy is taught that he can’t cry because that deems him weak or gay. Boys pin all their sadness up inside themselves, I know that holding onto feelings gets you nowhere. You keep burying all those feelings and emotions but eventually they have to come up; things that build will eventually fall or burst.
The time when these feelings come out depend on a boys life, how simple or hard they may find their life.
I find that the most common ages of these outbursts are late teen years and the early to mid 30s. I believe that is the reason a mid-life crisis is seen so often in men. What person wouldn’t eventually explode after holding onto so many things in their life.
It would be a bit better if all had a woman to turn to so that they could feel a certain level of intimacy and share their world with someone else. It’s important to have a close relationship with yourself and with God (if you believe and however you may believe) but it’s also important to have a close relationship with at least one other person. Sadly, a lot of women also believe in the same philosophies that have men trapped now.
Even though men aren’t always taught how to assess their feelings they are taught to be players and be in relationships. These relationships not only damage the women but they also further damage the men. Men go into relationships, the talking stage or etc. with no trust and no real knowledge of the other person all time — they go in second head first and with no real attraction but lust. What both men and women fail to understand is that soul ties are real so if you get with someone that has anger issues, depression or whatever else you can think of you’re going to receive something back. You have to think carefully about who you have sex with, do not have sex with someone you would not want to become even if you don’t think soul ties are real because that person will still be around you and they will be inside you or you will be inside them.
I believe that men should be allowed to talk about what they’re feeling, they should be taught that it is okay to cry because they’re humans. Just because they’re built a little different from women doesn’t mean they can’t be similar to women in ways.
Men should be able to do what they wanna do as long as they are not hurting anybody mentally or physically, and that goes for everyone.
Men deserve love, intimacy, and care too.
