It’s still a challenge for me to even ask a teacher questions I might have during class, no matter how hard I tried to overcome the fear of people making fun of me if I asked for help, I started to see it that way for everything. Growing up it was even harder to get help with my mental illnesses because it involved asking, taking up people’s time, and just talking a lot about my feelings and how it affects my everyday life. I felt like a constant baggage that no one understood, and pushing people away didn’t make it any better.
As time went by, I was an official wreck in trying to get through my day normally. Most of the time my parents didn’t even notice I was facing so many hardships in my everyday life. This led to lashing out at those I loved, completely isolating myself, and losing hope in everything, all because I was going through it alone. But what I didn’t know is that it didn’t have to be that way, and that I didn’t have to be in a complete state of misery for the rest of my life. Once I was all alone and couldn’t socialize properly like most of my peers I started realizing that it’d only get worse if I couldn’t help myself.
I had the mentality that I wouldn’t have been taken seriously if I talked about my feelings, I thought people would judge me for feeling the way I do or tell me that I’m overreacting.
Of course there was a process to getting professional help, it was a big challenge to overcome in actually talking about my differences. I remember the night I first spoke up about it, I was crying and prepared to hear that no one could help me get through it. That night I never even fully opened up to my parents about it, but briefly discussing what I was going through made them acknowledge the help I was asking for and I got help almost immediately. Looking back at it I’m relieved that I’ve finally accepted that receiving help from others isn’t the end of the world like I thought it’d be. It’s so easy to do nothing about your problems rather than seeking help for it.
Asking for help isn’t something anyone should ever be afraid of; it’s a complete act of bravery and a huge step to feeling better. Wanting to get better is also the mindset you should have when getting help, eventually you’ll realize how much people are there for you and that most people in your life are willing to help. There’s nothing more therapeutic than your family and friends being right by your side, whether they’re physically there for you or not, help is just a phone call away, and it doesn’t have to be for an emergency, if there’s something on your mind that you can’t seem to get through on your own I’m sure a loved one would want to hear about it and be there when you need them.
