Women Aren’t Obligated to React Positively to Objectification and Catcalls

So she’s walking down the street, minding her business when she hear’s a loud honk and she watches as a car of guys stare her and down and holler as they pass by. Or rather- she’s with a group of friends when a few guys start following in attempt to maybe get a number. Sometimes, she might even be grabbed or groped. Nothing wrong with that right? The guy just wanted to compliment her! Wrong. 

So many times, girls are told that they’re coincided b*****s because they responded with utter disgust instead of flattery, or rather just ignore it. Why are these cat callers so entitled? Wither he is intentionally trying to play alpha male or he’s simply fallen victim to the normalization of catcalling- it seems that it all draws back to the hyper-masculinity behind catcalling, which began in the 20th century. Could it be that males are completely unaware of how this makes females feel?

Studies show that 80 to 100 percent of women have been subjected to unwanted or harassing attention in public places from male strangers.

I ran two polls on Twitter targeted towards females, and the results weren’t shocking at all. I hope that this could be eye opening to men that either don’t know any better or don’t stop to take our feelings into consideration.

Ladies- you’re walking down the street and a guy starts cat calling, you-

— Yasia (@YahSeeYah) January 8, 2017

When you’re being followed by a cat caller (this is called street harassment) do you feel:

— Yasia (@YahSeeYah) January 8, 2017

Hm, why is it that most females that participated in the pole say that they choose to ignore the “positive” attention? The second poll that follows suggests that most females are likely scared when being catcalled. (Especially if they’re traveling alone.) Their silence is an attempt to avoid influencing men to keep it going. This is typically because these men make statements that dehumanize and imply that they’re entitled to our time. And well – they pretty much act like women are their property. It’s not a coincidence that this is commonly how kidnap ( Yes, I said kid – a recent study has shown that 84 per cent of women, across 22 countries, are experiencing street harassment before the age of 17) and rape victims are first approached.

So, cat callers, grab your pen, a piece of paper, and take some notes:

1. No, you can’t get a smile.
2. You cannot follow her after she’s made it clear that she’s not interested in talking to you.
3.  Under no circumstances do you have the right to touch or grope her.
4.  Know that she is not obligated to stop and talk, or even say “thank you.”
5. Don’t chase after her or yell. If she’s far away, you’ve missed your chance bro.
6. Just don’t do it.

Learn that there is a huge difference between simply complimenting someone, and cat calling.

Here are some tips on how to appropriately approach her:

1. Be sincere; genuine. Don’t be generic.
2. Smile.
3. Don’t check her out. Admire her.
4. Do not come off aggressive, but more gentle and formal.

Do: “Excuse me Ms? I don’t mean to interrupt you but I just wanted to let you know that you look great.”

Don’t: “Hey girl. You’re lookin’ real nice in that outfit.”

5. Make it short and sweet. People have places to be and things to do.

6. Move on with your day. Go your separate ways.

Follow those tips and I can almost promise you that you’ll receive a positive reaction. Plus, you made someone feel good. (Keyword: good.)